Moving to a new city or country is of course exciting, fun and thrilling but at the same time it can be stressful, lonely and overwhelming. I have some advice on how to settle into a new city or country and for anyone who is going through the same feelings I have had in the past.
Even for me, who is more of a gypsy spirit rather than a home bird, my recent move to Ibiza (even after 3 months) can at times be testing and difficult. No one wants to talk about loneliness or isolation but it is important to remember that SO many people are feeling the same way. Trust me.
I have moved to 2 countries and 4 cities alone in the past and I am proud of that. However, I think it is so important not to sugar coat it, this shit is hard! I love experiencing new cultures, new people and new adventures. So when I start to feel overwhelmed or uncomfortable in my environment, I bring myself back to why I am doing this, how much these experiences have helped me grow, be fiercely independent but most of all always challenge myself to be and do better and never get too comfy and plod along.
I will be honest with you, plodding along in life is something that scares the hell out of me! I have never been one to just sit and and hope that my dreams come to me, I work for it and will do anything to make it a reality., but life doesn’t go like that sometimes does it!? My advice would be to keep going and use the below advice to get you through them moments of doubt that we all have.
Get yourself out there and get involved
Ah, how it seems so simple to just get out and be around people but I have been in places sometimes where I have felt so overwhelmed at the thought of leaving my room. Where would I go? What would I do? Would people think I am weird sitting alone? Honestly, no one gives a shit. Dont isolate yourself. Get out there and join the gym, classes or volunteer at a local charity or something. This will help you meet people who are intersted in the things you are.
Get a good book and go!
Having a book has saved me at times. Whenever I am feeling a little low I just grab my book, go to a busy coffee shop and loose myself in it. There is no better distraction than a book you cant put down!
Join apps like Bumble and Meetup
As we live in a crazy digital world, it comes with perks like Bumble. Whilst it is a dating app you can also choose the option of finding a ‘BFF’ and it searches in your area. The ball is in your court too to message the other person if you match. It goes without saying to always take care when using these apps ( always meet in a busy place etc) but they can be really helpful. You will also find that there are so many other people in your position feeling the way you are!
Meetup is great too! You can choose your area and join groups that interest you and attend the meetups when they have a next event.
Join groups on Facebook
These have been a lifesaver when I have needed any advice or just to see if anyone is around and wants to hang out. The groups are full of amazing, likeminded people who will do anything to help you out! Again, its all about putting yourself out there, dont be afraid to go for it! Also a handy tip is search for the area you are in and see what groups are on Facebook. For example I am in a few Solo Travel Ibiza groups.
My favourite Facebook groups are :
Girls who travel: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=200344506976547
Digital Nomad Girls Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/DigitalNomadGirls/
Female Travel Bloggers https://www.facebook.com/groups/femaletravelbloggers/
Promise yourself to speak to one new person a day ask questions about them
Don’t be scared to do things alone – the best people i have met are when i feel most vulnerable
Be open and honest
When you are at your most venerable, you learn to truly reach out to others, and this is a beautiful thing because we are seeking out companionship and in return, you generally realise that alot of people feel the exact way you do. My advice would be to talk honestly bout your feelings and I bet you find someone to bond with about it!
I hope this helps!